You can come out of Sunday night's game and do what most people are doing, and continue to fellate the Patriots while slapping the Birds on the back for their moral victory, losing by only three to the Greatest Team In NFL History, Ever, quarterbacked by Tom He Just Plays Like a Champion (that's his Indian name). It's easy to do that, if it's the only Eagles game you've watched this year. It's easy to buy the idea that this is a good franchise that can sneak up on anybody, even the mighty, peerless Patriots.
Well, that's bullshit. I'll tell you what I take from the game: the Pats are not that good.
Let's get it out of the way now: how good is that good, exactly? They're the best team in the NFL this season. That's it. I'm sick of hearing all this other hype. I'm not convinced this year's Pats are the best team I've seen in the last three years, or in the salary cap era, or even that they're better than the '04 Pats. I've only followed the NFL for about 15 years, only really followed it for about ten, and they're not even close to the best team I've seen, much less the best ever. Who is? More on that later.
For now, let's discuss what happened last night. Not that you heard any of this from the announcers or studio analysts, but here's what happened. The Patriots went to the wire with a team that:
1. Was .500 going into the game, both this season and over the last three seasons combined. For those of you who remember the 2004 Eagles, know that this is not that team. This is not a good football team. This is a team that got embarrassed by the Cowboys and Giants this year. This is a last-place team.
2. Was playing on the road, in late November, in one of the hardest places to play in football.
3. Started A.J. Feeley at QB. Yeah, he played well, spectacularly except for a few bad throws -- even if those throws did cost them the game. But he's had enough NFL starts -- 20-ish -- to show exactly who he is and who he isn't. He isn't an NFL-caliber starting QB. Ask the Dolphins. And he spotted them 7 points right off the bat on a horrendous throw. A guy who's been starting all season doesn't come out and throw that ball on the third play. Now, I'm not saying Donovan McNabb would have won this game -- he wouldn't have, and there's no doubt in my mind, but that's a whole different post. Only that a pretty mediocre quarterback started in his place.
4. Started one third-string safety who was out of the NFL a few weeks ago (and got hurt during the game), and another who's 34 and banged up, against the best passing attack in the league. Both starting safeties dropped crucial interceptions that should have been caught pretty easily.
5. Was coached about as poorly as could be, offensively. The defensive game plan was great, and although I'm sick of Jim Johnson and his constant blitzing, the three-man front was brilliant. The no-huddle four-wide would have shredded a lot of defenses. But Reid and Morninwheg pulled all their usual bullshit, burning timeouts they'd need later, and -- in a move that would have given me a coronary if I weren't already expecting it, because I've seen the same thing so many times -- they called a deep pass pattern on the final drive, when the only reasonable gameplan in the world would have been to run the ball or throw short passes for two minutes and go for the tying field goal. Feeley made a bad throw -- LJ was open short -- but he never should have been put in that position.
6. Did not force a turnover, unless you count the turnover on downs when the Mastermind decided to go for it and the Second Coming threw a duck. Usually when a team loses to a lesser team, turnovers are the reason: a few freak fumbles, Eli Manning's three pick-sixes against Minnesota. The Pats dominated the turnover battle, including a pick-six two minutes in, and still barely won.
7. Got a grand total of 92 yards from its best player. That's 60 less than Westbrook has averaged on the year. It would be much more understandable if the Eagles were close because Westbrook blew up, but he was not much of a factor.
All that, and the Best Team Ever still needed a few breaks to win by three? Get the fuck out of here. A couple of things go the other way -- that inexplicable fourth-down offsides by the Eagles, which led to the Maroney TD; if one more safety was healthy, the Birds wouldn't have had linebackers on Welker all night; if they catch even one of those picks; if Feeley throws only one baffling interception to Samuel instead of two -- and the Eagles win.
(So right about now is when some of our faithful commenters accuse me of making excuses for the Eagles. But that's not what I'm doing here -- if I was going to do that, I'd mention how Brady false-started all game, stepping back and ducking his shoulders in an oft-successful attempt to draw offsides, but never got flagged for it, or how that Gaffney TD would have been reviewed if any other team in football scored it, or how, if you watch that fourth-down offsides again, it looks like a false start. But I'm not going to do that.)
What I'm saying is that there's a reason the spread was the biggest ever. The Eagles are a mediocre, banged-up team, and the Pats had looked like a great one all year. It was in Foxboro. The Pats had nobody injured going in. A historically great, healthy team at home against AJ Feeley? It should have been a massacre.
Except it wasn't, because the Pats aren't that great. Brady got rattled under pressure -- not that much pressure, either -- and started airmailing receivers or throwing what should have been interceptions. They dropped a ton of passes. Moss got jammed at the line and frustrated into irrelevance. Stallworth was invisible. They have no running game. Their linebackers can't cover for shit, so the middle was wide open all day. Their D-line couldn't get to Feeley. Their kicker missed an easy field goal.
So what? The Pats still won, right? Yeah, they did. And maybe winning -- even if it's close, even if it takes a little luck -- is the mark of a champion (barf). But I just don't want to hear it anymore about the fucking 2007 Patriots being the best team ever. The team I saw tonight wasn't even close to the early '90s Cowboys, as much as it pains me to use that hated franchise as a reference point. Or the Steve Young Niners. Those teams didn't need to play their best game -- no turnovers, a defensive TD, no key penalties -- to beat shitty teams at home.
The Pats' flaws were exposed today, and they are few but significant. They have no real running game. They have a bunch of geriatric linebackers who can play a mean fullback and tight end but can't cover anybody. Brady is human if you can ever get pressure on him (which rarely happens, because they have a great O-line, not that you'd ever hear it in all the Tom Brady fluffing). Outside of Asante Samuel, their secondary is pedestrian. Their D-line doesn't get much push. And if Brady sees pressure like he did tonight, you could be looking at Matt Cassell under center. He's been lucky so far, but look around the NFL and see how many starting QBs are hurt. One play could end all this history talk real quick. (Are you listening, Ray Lewis?)
If the Pats run the table this year, that says more about the sorry state of the NFL than it does about their greatness. I don't see it happening. If the Steelers or Giants don't get them, they'll still have to face a Colts team that ought to be healthier by then.
Either way, they're not the best team ever. Last night's game made that pretty clear.
Showing posts with label reasons why Andy Reid needs to be fired. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reasons why Andy Reid needs to be fired. Show all posts
Monday, November 26, 2007
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
November is the cruelest month ...
or maybe that was April. If my boy T-money had run a sports blog instead of penning whackjob Modernist opuses, he'd have changed the month but kept the title: we're in the Waste Land. (That's right, mothereffers, I just dropped a T.S. Eliot reference into the first line. You know you missed me.)
So it's been awhile, awhile as in amonthorso. I been busy, you know? I've been writing postmodernist short stories about gay priests and reading Oakley Hall and Haruki Murakami and applying for jobs in Singapore and dressing up as Kevin Federline, in addition to my usual hatin' and perpetratin'. And besides, nothing of note has happened. back then the Phillies were on the fast train out of Playoffsville and the Eagles had just been curbstomped by an NFC East rival.
Well, the train arrived on schedule. Otherwise, shit is the same. What about the World Series, you say? What about it? Maybe you mistook me for some asshole chowd if you thought I gave a flying f-word. All it did was cement Boston, a city I used to love above all others except Philadelphia, as the red dot on the target of my sporting hatred. Worst sports fans in the world. I miss the curse. Let's move on.
What about Pats/Colts, you say? Actually, I doubt anybody said that, because the goddamned game was covered like a fresh body by everybody from Stu Scott to your neighborhood Pats douche. And AFC football resides right above IHL hockey on the list of sporting leagues I give a shit about.
What about the Eagles? Oh Christ, who even cares anymore. They suck for all the reasons I've been talking about for years. Their offensive and defensive playcalling expose their personnel weaknesses rather than playing to their strengths. They have no receivers. The coaching is as abominable as I've ever seen. Westbrook can't save them when he doesn't get the touches, and McNabb's not good (or healthy, or both) enough to win games on his own anymore, which has been true for two years. The only new thing that's come up in the last few weeks is that Andy Reid's house is a drug emporium. He still won't be fired this season, so I'll have to watch the same bullshit next year -- pass every down on offense, blitz every down on defense -- and, barring a 4-12 season (which I'm praying for this year), he might not be fired even then. His contract is too big. So from here on out I'm just waiting for them to finally blow it up and rebuild. And drinking. A lot.
There's the J-Roll for MVP campaign I've been trying to mount. But the NL MVP isn't announced for two more weeks, and the voters will give it to Holliday, because his team made the World Series (where he and they both pulled an epic choke job), and because they don't care about the fact that he's not an MVP-caliber player on the road, or other little things like the defensive half of the game or speed or runs scored.
The start of the NBA? Please. Why don't we just write about NASCAR.
College ball? Well, it's early, but Lute Olson has taken a leave of absence. There's that. But I don't know what to say other than that I wonder if Parkinson's disease qualifies as a "personal reason." The only person with any sort of inside perspective whom I know, TGWNA's good friend Anonymous, didn't have much to say about it. Personally, I think this is his last season. He looked horrendous by the end of last year -- you no longer need to be looking or have HD to see the shakes and bewilderment -- and so did his team. I don't worship Lute like most Tucsonans and UA alums, because I've had to interview him and I've watched immensely talented but poorly coached UA teams choke for the last six years. But it's still really sad to see this. I've been a UA fan for a long time -- I went to his basketball camp in sixth grade, and have the hopelessly awkward picture to prove it -- and I certainly don't have any animosity for him, either. (Can't speak for my compatriot on that one, though.)
Maybe I'm way off here. I'm sure something else really is going on to prompt the leave of absence. But I'm also pretty sure the team will play better without him, and that his age will become an unavoidable issue this year, and that, even in Tucson, the whispers have probably already started. Once that happens, it's only a matter of time. I think the best-case scenario for Lute lovers is that he remains the figurehead for two more years, with O'Neill running the show behind the scenes. Let's just hope O'Neill can pull a Ben Howland and turn around a sinking program. I guess the worst case is that he never coaches another game, but I don't think that'll happen.
But hey, what do I care? As of tomorrow, I'll be a member of Sixth Man! Suck on that, you public school plebes.
So it's been awhile, awhile as in amonthorso. I been busy, you know? I've been writing postmodernist short stories about gay priests and reading Oakley Hall and Haruki Murakami and applying for jobs in Singapore and dressing up as Kevin Federline, in addition to my usual hatin' and perpetratin'. And besides, nothing of note has happened. back then the Phillies were on the fast train out of Playoffsville and the Eagles had just been curbstomped by an NFC East rival.
Well, the train arrived on schedule. Otherwise, shit is the same. What about the World Series, you say? What about it? Maybe you mistook me for some asshole chowd if you thought I gave a flying f-word. All it did was cement Boston, a city I used to love above all others except Philadelphia, as the red dot on the target of my sporting hatred. Worst sports fans in the world. I miss the curse. Let's move on.
What about Pats/Colts, you say? Actually, I doubt anybody said that, because the goddamned game was covered like a fresh body by everybody from Stu Scott to your neighborhood Pats douche. And AFC football resides right above IHL hockey on the list of sporting leagues I give a shit about.
What about the Eagles? Oh Christ, who even cares anymore. They suck for all the reasons I've been talking about for years. Their offensive and defensive playcalling expose their personnel weaknesses rather than playing to their strengths. They have no receivers. The coaching is as abominable as I've ever seen. Westbrook can't save them when he doesn't get the touches, and McNabb's not good (or healthy, or both) enough to win games on his own anymore, which has been true for two years. The only new thing that's come up in the last few weeks is that Andy Reid's house is a drug emporium. He still won't be fired this season, so I'll have to watch the same bullshit next year -- pass every down on offense, blitz every down on defense -- and, barring a 4-12 season (which I'm praying for this year), he might not be fired even then. His contract is too big. So from here on out I'm just waiting for them to finally blow it up and rebuild. And drinking. A lot.
There's the J-Roll for MVP campaign I've been trying to mount. But the NL MVP isn't announced for two more weeks, and the voters will give it to Holliday, because his team made the World Series (where he and they both pulled an epic choke job), and because they don't care about the fact that he's not an MVP-caliber player on the road, or other little things like the defensive half of the game or speed or runs scored.
The start of the NBA? Please. Why don't we just write about NASCAR.
College ball? Well, it's early, but Lute Olson has taken a leave of absence. There's that. But I don't know what to say other than that I wonder if Parkinson's disease qualifies as a "personal reason." The only person with any sort of inside perspective whom I know, TGWNA's good friend Anonymous, didn't have much to say about it. Personally, I think this is his last season. He looked horrendous by the end of last year -- you no longer need to be looking or have HD to see the shakes and bewilderment -- and so did his team. I don't worship Lute like most Tucsonans and UA alums, because I've had to interview him and I've watched immensely talented but poorly coached UA teams choke for the last six years. But it's still really sad to see this. I've been a UA fan for a long time -- I went to his basketball camp in sixth grade, and have the hopelessly awkward picture to prove it -- and I certainly don't have any animosity for him, either. (Can't speak for my compatriot on that one, though.)
Maybe I'm way off here. I'm sure something else really is going on to prompt the leave of absence. But I'm also pretty sure the team will play better without him, and that his age will become an unavoidable issue this year, and that, even in Tucson, the whispers have probably already started. Once that happens, it's only a matter of time. I think the best-case scenario for Lute lovers is that he remains the figurehead for two more years, with O'Neill running the show behind the scenes. Let's just hope O'Neill can pull a Ben Howland and turn around a sinking program. I guess the worst case is that he never coaches another game, but I don't think that'll happen.
But hey, what do I care? As of tomorrow, I'll be a member of Sixth Man! Suck on that, you public school plebes.
Monday, September 10, 2007
Football's back!
and it's gonna be trouble. I didn't make it to Kezar Pub, where the Birds fans congregate, because a couple of friends went early and it was wall-to-wall by 9:30, partly because of the rugby world cup. Wound up watching the game at an English pub in the Haight full of fucking cheeseheads. Missed the first half (I know that makes me a bad fan, but I had a good excuse), got there when it was tied, talked a bunch of painkiller smack on Favre, made a Mark Chmura crack or two, the usual.
Thoughts on the game: I've seen worse. The one thing that really bothers me is that it's an NFC game, so it might come back to haunt them in tiebreakers and such later (a la the horseshit 62-yard field goal loss to Tampa last year). We'd beaten the Pack five straight times, including probably the greatest single Eagles play I've ever witnessed -- one of those few plays for which I'll always remember where I was when it happened (although that's sort of easy, since the answer's usually Old Chicago), so they owed us. Plus it was in Lambeau, and they've got a good defense.
And the Eagles played well enough to win. The Eagles offense is what it is: baffling, maddening, inconsistent, but occasionally explosive and good enough when it needs to be. (Even in a weak effort, the offense played well enough to win today.) The playcalling sucked, overall, and yet the fact that the play breakdown was something like 28/33 run/pass is very heartening to me. D-Mac didn't look sharp, and his stats weren't great, but there were four or five dropped passes in the third quarter alone that really hurt. He often starts seasons poorly; he'll be fine. Reggie Brown disappeared for a game, as he is wont to do, but Jason Avant had a nice game in his place.
The defense was what really worried me going in, considering they had three new starting linebackers and a few new d-linemen, and they were really bad last year, especially against the run. Granted, it's the Packers, but the D was stellar: no offensive TDs allowed, right around 50 rushing yards, a couple of turnovers.
Special teams lost this game. Specifically, Greg Lewis and J.R. Reed's respective foibles -- Lewis botching one kick that wound up a Packers TD, and Reed screwing the pooch completely on a hapless fair-catch attempt that directly cost the Eagles the game. But I have a hard time blaming either of them, considering neither has returned punts before. We had a reliable and sure-handed, if decidedly non-dangerous, returner for the last few years in Reno Mahe, whom I like perhaps too much because he's Vai Sikahema's cousin. He also worked at Chickie and Pete's part-time in the offseason and is reportedly related to the Barbarian. Then we cut him because Reid and Co. were so high on Jeremy Bloom, a skier who has since been cut himself. Luckily, I think this whole punt-return situation is a pretty easy fix: sign Reno, who's still a free agent, mostly because he's not very good at anything but catching punts. Rumor has it (on Igglephans) the team plans to bring him in for a tryout. At least you know what you get with him: he's never returned a punt for a TD, but he had one of the NFL's best YPRs last year, and he rarely fumbles. Besides, if the Birds are in a situation where they really need a big return, they've still got this guy. (The first play of that clip is one of my all-time Eagles top 5. God, I love beating the Giants.)
Then just cut Reed to make room for him. He's expendable, as much as everybody likes him after that ghastly injury and his gutsy comeback. He was never that good to begin with.
In other words, despite what the predictable Philly reaction has been thus far, the sky's not falling. But we absolutely must beat Washington next Monday.
Thoughts on other games I watched, at least in part:
LT is the single most amazing football player I've ever seen play. If he were an Eagle I would probably become his stalker. I've always put away my homerishness when it comes to him, and agreed that he's the best back in football, so I often think that I realize how good he is. Then I watch him play, and realize that I didn't realize. I'm no historian, but I can't imagine there's ever been a RB who was clearly better.
That said, the Chargers as a whole did not impress me, and Philip Rivers in particular does not -- and never has -- strike me as anything more than an above-average NFL QB. And not that far above average.
On the flip side of that game, the Bears are pretenders, just like I've been saying. Their best scoring option is a punt returner.
Regarding other predictions I made a while ago ...
I wish I had considered the Rams' defense before anointing them.
I stick with my Lions pick.
I might be wrong about the Panthers/Saints, but I'm not conceding that just yet. Let's see the Panthers do something against a team that has a secondary. (Why the hell don't opposing DCs just game-plan to triple Steve Smith? He's the only good player on that entire offense!)
The Giants are in real trouble.
Next season, the Redskins might be as good as everybody seems to think they are right now.
I hate the Patriots more than I have any right to hate a team from another conference.
I didn't get to see the Seahawks game, but it sounds like they had a solid performance against a mediocre team, which -- in all seriousness -- is harder than it sounds. And the stats seem to indicate that both Hasselbeck and Alexander played well. Still, the fact that the Bucs were trailing by 4 in the third quarter in Seattle should keep Seth's claims of NFC dominance in check for another week or two. Or dare I dream? I'm curious to see what they do against a good team.
Thus far, their defensive travails notwithstanding (Plaxico Burress is the most underrated WR in the NFL by a wide margin), I would have to say the best team in the NFC is not the Bears nor Saints nor Eagles nor Hawks, but the Cowboys. Now let me go wash the taste of vomit out of my mouth ...
Thoughts on the game: I've seen worse. The one thing that really bothers me is that it's an NFC game, so it might come back to haunt them in tiebreakers and such later (a la the horseshit 62-yard field goal loss to Tampa last year). We'd beaten the Pack five straight times, including probably the greatest single Eagles play I've ever witnessed -- one of those few plays for which I'll always remember where I was when it happened (although that's sort of easy, since the answer's usually Old Chicago), so they owed us. Plus it was in Lambeau, and they've got a good defense.
And the Eagles played well enough to win. The Eagles offense is what it is: baffling, maddening, inconsistent, but occasionally explosive and good enough when it needs to be. (Even in a weak effort, the offense played well enough to win today.) The playcalling sucked, overall, and yet the fact that the play breakdown was something like 28/33 run/pass is very heartening to me. D-Mac didn't look sharp, and his stats weren't great, but there were four or five dropped passes in the third quarter alone that really hurt. He often starts seasons poorly; he'll be fine. Reggie Brown disappeared for a game, as he is wont to do, but Jason Avant had a nice game in his place.
The defense was what really worried me going in, considering they had three new starting linebackers and a few new d-linemen, and they were really bad last year, especially against the run. Granted, it's the Packers, but the D was stellar: no offensive TDs allowed, right around 50 rushing yards, a couple of turnovers.
Special teams lost this game. Specifically, Greg Lewis and J.R. Reed's respective foibles -- Lewis botching one kick that wound up a Packers TD, and Reed screwing the pooch completely on a hapless fair-catch attempt that directly cost the Eagles the game. But I have a hard time blaming either of them, considering neither has returned punts before. We had a reliable and sure-handed, if decidedly non-dangerous, returner for the last few years in Reno Mahe, whom I like perhaps too much because he's Vai Sikahema's cousin. He also worked at Chickie and Pete's part-time in the offseason and is reportedly related to the Barbarian. Then we cut him because Reid and Co. were so high on Jeremy Bloom, a skier who has since been cut himself. Luckily, I think this whole punt-return situation is a pretty easy fix: sign Reno, who's still a free agent, mostly because he's not very good at anything but catching punts. Rumor has it (on Igglephans) the team plans to bring him in for a tryout. At least you know what you get with him: he's never returned a punt for a TD, but he had one of the NFL's best YPRs last year, and he rarely fumbles. Besides, if the Birds are in a situation where they really need a big return, they've still got this guy. (The first play of that clip is one of my all-time Eagles top 5. God, I love beating the Giants.)
Then just cut Reed to make room for him. He's expendable, as much as everybody likes him after that ghastly injury and his gutsy comeback. He was never that good to begin with.
In other words, despite what the predictable Philly reaction has been thus far, the sky's not falling. But we absolutely must beat Washington next Monday.
Thoughts on other games I watched, at least in part:
LT is the single most amazing football player I've ever seen play. If he were an Eagle I would probably become his stalker. I've always put away my homerishness when it comes to him, and agreed that he's the best back in football, so I often think that I realize how good he is. Then I watch him play, and realize that I didn't realize. I'm no historian, but I can't imagine there's ever been a RB who was clearly better.
That said, the Chargers as a whole did not impress me, and Philip Rivers in particular does not -- and never has -- strike me as anything more than an above-average NFL QB. And not that far above average.
On the flip side of that game, the Bears are pretenders, just like I've been saying. Their best scoring option is a punt returner.
Regarding other predictions I made a while ago ...
I wish I had considered the Rams' defense before anointing them.
I stick with my Lions pick.
I might be wrong about the Panthers/Saints, but I'm not conceding that just yet. Let's see the Panthers do something against a team that has a secondary. (Why the hell don't opposing DCs just game-plan to triple Steve Smith? He's the only good player on that entire offense!)
The Giants are in real trouble.
Next season, the Redskins might be as good as everybody seems to think they are right now.
I hate the Patriots more than I have any right to hate a team from another conference.
I didn't get to see the Seahawks game, but it sounds like they had a solid performance against a mediocre team, which -- in all seriousness -- is harder than it sounds. And the stats seem to indicate that both Hasselbeck and Alexander played well. Still, the fact that the Bucs were trailing by 4 in the third quarter in Seattle should keep Seth's claims of NFC dominance in check for another week or two. Or dare I dream? I'm curious to see what they do against a good team.
Thus far, their defensive travails notwithstanding (Plaxico Burress is the most underrated WR in the NFL by a wide margin), I would have to say the best team in the NFC is not the Bears nor Saints nor Eagles nor Hawks, but the Cowboys. Now let me go wash the taste of vomit out of my mouth ...
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