As many of you know, Pepe is moving to the Mecca of the faux-Euro bourgeoisie, San Francisco. Since Diesel hasn't taken a vacation since returning from the motherland last year, he decided to ride shotgun on the harrowing trek, mostly in an attempt to bludgeon Pepe into appreciating the artistry of Weezy F. Baby. Throughout the next couple of days, we'll be posting a travelogue of sorts, as Pepe mostly makes up stories about things I really didn't do/say, and I attempt to correct the record whilst preserving my good name.
Quick trip highlights so far:
- Some teenage girls at the Dodgers game who were sitting in the upper deck started throwing peanuts at the people down below, one of which landed in my almost-full Miller Lite. I verbally threatened the life of the girls, and attempted to take the stairs up to the upper deck so I could follow through on the threat. I was stopped by security, sadly, who informed me they were "on top of it."
- We stayed with my friends Adam and Missy, who are currently staying with family just outside of Santa Clarita. In addition to spending virtually all of our time in the two nicest houses I've ever been inside, I saw a collection of sports memorabilia that is absolutely insane, including the signed, game-worn jersey from Alex Rodriguez's first game in the majors. Yes, that would be something that probably should be in Cooperstown.
- Pepe saw a sign in L.A. that read, "Impeach and hang the lying bastard." I fucking love L.A.
There's way, way more, but we're off to an Athletics game, so the rest will have to wait. Inasmuch as the powers of embellishment don't reside on this side of the blog's bicameral administration, I imagine Pepe's accounts will be much more entertaining.
See you broke-asses on the other side.